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Ten Trends We’re Over

by fatweb

By Jonathon Taylor

Cloud computing

Excuse me for being a bit backward, but what exactly is the ‘cloud’? It sounds like off-site IT with a fancy name. And what happens if someone, in that magical information land, trips over the cord? The cloud makes an already murky realm even more anomalous.

The occupy movement

OK, you made your point; unchecked corporate greed destroyed lives and nearly ruined our rather imperfect world. But dressing like hippies and camping in public spaces for weeks on end isn’t really helping change anything; it’s actually obstructing progress and is now just annoying.

Greek bailouts

Well knock me over with a feather – a nation with a lax attitude to taxation that used the Euro zone’s triple A credit rating to borrow more than it could afford is in financial strife. Fact is, Greece has defaulted on its external sovereign debt obligations at least five previous times in the modern era (1826, 1843, 1860, 1894 and 1932). Whether it’s horrendous fiscal miss-management, or simply cooking the books, we’re sick of hearing about it.

Climate change denial

Climate change denial seems to be spreading like an infectious disease. Now there’s nothing wrong with healthy scepticism and reasoned individuals should embrace vigorous debate about the causes, consequences and role human endeavour might, or might not, play in climate change. But simply denying any change is occurring flies in the face of what is being observed.

Reality TV

Like anything, reality TV has its good and bad. But because ‘good’ shows are now endangered species, being eaten alive by increasingly common trash fests, the entire genre needs putting out to pasture.

Passing off scripted scenarios as being ‘real’ fools only fools and insults everyone else’s intelligence, meaning the loudest laughs are from network executives, whose advertising revenue to production cost ratios are off the chart.

Bad reality TV is the bastard cousin of the low-brow chat show, which basically exploits individuals whose attention desperation disorder means they’ll do anything to get on ‘telly’ because of its association with status and importance. Jerry Springer set the tone these shows still dance to.

Insipid Facebook status updates

All hail the electronic alter of the self important. If you update your status more than daily you’re attention whoring.

The exodus to Aus

It’s estimated that during the past three years, around 100,000 Kiwis have jumped the ditch, unable to resist the appeal of higher wages and a supposedly more prosperous future. And yes, the wage gap between New Zealand and Australia is now said to be around 40 percent, and growing.

But buyer beware; the cost of living is higher, property prices in Sydney are obscene and you could be mistaken for thinking the stereotypical Aussie’s attitude to immigrants is ‘naff off – we’re full’.

If making more money is the sole criteria by which you value your quality of life – then away you go, waltzing Matilida all the way.

Republican Party lunacy

Extending constitutional rights to zygotes, eliminating restrictions on big oil and returning Wall Street to its pre-crash unrestricted ways were some the best and brightest ideas from GOP presidential contenders. Michelle Bachman’s genius plan to reduce federal spending was simple, stunning and beyond scary; closing down the US Environmental Protection Agency.

Even Sarah Palin and the Tea Party look viable by comparison, as politically irrational and nonsensical policies have lurched it from a party to a sect. One that interprets Abraham Lincoln’s famous utterance of a government “… of the people, by the people, for the people…,” as “of the elite, for the elite, by the duped”.

Vampires

Unless you were 12 with a crush on a 24 year old passing themselves off as a teenager, vampires were never ‘in’ to begin with. So enough already – the concept isn’t original or scary.

Celebrity comments

I’m sorry, but when I want information about the ongoing financial crisis, or sectarian unrest in any particular global hot spot, I’ll listen to what an economist, historian or political scientist has to offer – not a Hollywood A-lister. Their professional expertise extends to looking good while remembering anywhere up to three scripted sentences at any one time. Yes, even as impressive as this is, perhaps specialist subjects are best left to studied experts.

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