Dr Mary Casey
Founder and CEO of the Casey Centre
www.caseycentre.com.au
Started a new job only to discover it’s a minefield of gossip and negativity? Is your workload causing your social life to shrivel up? Or is management leaving you feeling micromanaged or, worse, neglected?
Even though many of us think we could never be content at work, we aren’t powerless and can achieve satisfaction. A large part of what we can control is how we respond to the culture, colleagues and the work.
Choose your job carefully: Establishing a feel for a work environment early on can save you later. It is hard to know beforehand the office culture, but it is essential to not focus solely on salary when making a decision. In the interview, ask questions about management style and culture.
Don’t take anything personally: For your sanity, it is worth developing some emotional and mental detachment – especially from any individuals that radiate negativity. It is a skill that takes time to develop, but being detached in the workplace means you are able to judge and make decisions rationally and impartially.
Don’t let negative emotions control you: When you feel like you are losing control to anger, stress or fear, take a short walk around the block. Never get emotional in front of managers or colleagues. In a negative work culture it may be used against you in the future.
Disengage from manipulators: Manipulation is about controlling another person’s behaviour, so make it clear what you will and won’t accept both verbally and behaviourally. When confronting a manipulative co-worker, they may play emotional games to make you feel guilty or discredit you. Don’t be pulled into their tactics – take the discussion back to the issue you are trying to confront.
Create positive allies: You can create a positive workplace “sub-culture” by developing friendships with like-minded co-workers. Identify positive, supportive colleagues and go to lunch or drinks with them to develop the relationship.
Find fulfilment elsewhere: Sometimes we think work is the cause of our unhappiness, when it is actually another area in our lives – such as a relationship or our health – that we are unhappy with, and which is spilling into our work. Taking up a sport, hobby or volunteering can also create a sense of fulfilment in our lives. Committing yourself to something you really enjoy will help with your mindset when at work.
Treat yourself: Do good things for yourself throughout the day. If you find your morning is turning into a disaster, organise dinner with a friend, buy flowers for your desk, anything that makes you feel good.
